Stressed About Money? 3 Key Steps to Financial Wellness
I’m going to ask you to reflect for a moment.
When you feel out of shape, is it easier or harder to accomplish your goals?
If your answer is “easier,” you are one of the few. I don’t know how you do it.
For the rest of us, our experience is usually that our bodies’ functionality has a HUGE impact on how well we reach our goals.
As ensouled bodies, we cannot actually ignore what our bodies need without serious consequences. Being physically and emotionally unhealthy makes wise decision-making that much harder. It becomes difficult to take action toward the life we truly want.
It is well-documented in medical literature that lack of sleep, sedentary lifestyles, poor nutrition, and ineffective stress management lead to poor mental health outcomes…
Which affects our ability to make sound decisions, including financial ones.
Which leaves us feeling stressed about money.
Which makes it harder to reach our goals, especially goals like financial independence or early retirement.
Do you see where I’m going with this?
There’s no question that physical, emotional, and financial health are intertwined.
Consider the following scenario:
You have a goal of getting promoted at the company you work for. You’ve been working hard. Unfortunately, you and your spouse are discovering that the new house you bought was not the right financial move.
The initial excitement of owning a home has given way to anxiety and sleepless nights.
You find yourself ruminating, full of fearful thoughts about making your next mortgage payment. Because you’ve been losing sleep, you’ve developed a serious caffeine dependency. You drink tons of coffee, perpetuating a cycle of energy depletion.
As a result, you’re having difficulty concentrating. At work, you’re frenzied and less engaged, causing your productivity to drop. Your boss notices your poor performance and passes you over for the promotion (and the raise) you were hoping to get.
Hopefully, this hypothetical scenario clearly shows how an unwise financial decision can impact your sense of equanimity, which can have physical consequences that create further obstacles to achieving your goals.
Depending on how you handle the situation, you can either make a comeback from a poor decision or spiral into an even worse situation.
It’s my job as a family finance expert to help parents reverse this trend of feast or famine. Instead of yo-yo-ing between exuberant risk-taking and paralyzing anxiety, there is a middle path of prudence and patience.
By taking that emotionally mature middle road, you can live richly even if you aren’t yet “rich” in financial terms.
However, finding that balance is not easy. Building wealth does take effort and intentionality, as well as a holistic approach.
In this article, I want to offer three key steps to achieving your goal of financial wellness. But first, let’s take a deeper dive into the connection between financial health and physical health.
FINANCIAL WELLNESS AND PHYSICAL HEALTH
Everyday Health conducted the United States of Stress Survey in 2018 and noticed that finances were the number one stressor among men and women alike. More recently, the American Psychological Association notes that inflation, money issues, and the war in Ukraine have pushed U.S. stress to alarming levels.
I find it interesting that over 70% of American adults are overweight or obese according to CDC statistics, and the same percentage of Americans have at least one credit card.
Credit cards aren’t intrinsically evil. That’s not what I’m saying at all.
However, charging the card when you don’t have a solid plan to pay it off in full is a vicious cycle. Exhibiting an excellent credit score — defined as 720 or higher — is key to financial wellness.
NerdWallet offers four great tips to improve your credit score. The biggest factor is payment history, which means consistently paying every bill on time.
Lack of discipline in one area of life impacts other areas.
If you miss paying the credit card bill this month, you might dig into a pint of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream when you see the staggering interest charge and penalty the following month. Or your motivation may wane tomorrow to go for an early morning run as you think about the upcoming air conditioner repair appointment.
Or, as in the opening hypothetical scenario, letting anxious thoughts run amok can result in missed opportunities at work.
But studies and polls only go so far. Rather than totally relying on statistics and hypothetical scenarios, let me tell you a real-life story.
MY STRUGGLE WITH WELLNESS
My family and I spent three months of 2018 in Spain.
It was amazing. But honestly, I didn’t always opt for healthy food choices and gained several pounds while living abroad.
I can blame some of that weight gain on food access — many restaurants never served entrees with vegetables. Nonetheless, we could have eaten more often in our rental home. Eating out is expensive, especially for a family of five.
In addition to meals out, we frequently purchased ice cream or other sweets while exploring the city.
Walking and using public transit were commonplace in the bigger Spanish cities that we visited. I didn’t belong to a gym but probably walked at least two miles a day.
However, this wasn’t enough to combat my unhealthy eating habits.
It took a long time to readjust when we returned from Spain to the U.S. The pace of life here is faster, with more demands on my time. Prioritizing physical health takes dedication.
I now live in Florida and exercise regularly.
Transitioning back to the U.S. wasn’t just hard physically. It was emotionally difficult, too.
To make our dream of living abroad a reality, we went from two incomes down to one. My husband Bryan cared for the kids during our stay in Spain while I continued to run WorthyNest® and SV CPA Services remotely.
Unfortunately, Bryan’s job search post-Spain took longer than expected. The financial stress of a single income took an emotional toll on both of us.
I experienced lots of anxiety, though I did my best to manage it. I was sincerely relieved when Bryan found employment.
The three key steps to financial wellness (and overall health!) have helped me personally, especially through difficult transitions. I want to share them in the hope that they will be helpful for you as well.
3 STEPS TO BECOME HEALTHY, WEALTHY, AND WISE
If you’re in a financial rut, below are three actionable steps you can take to improve your overall level of wellness.
1) DEVELOP NEW “SOUNDTRACKS” AND GOOD LIFE HABITS
New York Times bestselling author Jon Acuff enlisted the help of researcher Mike Peasley, PhD, to survey 10,000 people about whether they struggle with overthinking.
Over 99.5% of survey respondents said yes!
Acuff’s book Soundtracks turns overthinking from a super problem into a superpower. I received an advance copy of the book and read it in less than a week… it’s that amazing!
Think about the soundtracks that are playing in your head right now. It might be something like this:
“I’m not good with money.”
or
“I’m not disciplined enough to make smart financial decisions.”
These are lies that you have conditioned yourself to believe over time. What if you replace those limiting beliefs with positive mantras?
Here are some examples:
“I can learn how to better manage money.”
or
“Reaching my financial goals is possible with the right coach and consistent effort.”
Remember the earlier example where anxious thoughts led to losing out on an opportunity?
Maybe those thoughts sounded like…
“I can’t believe we made such a stupid decision. I’m such an idiot. I shouldn’t have let my spouse talk me into this. I have no clue how we’re going to pay the mortgage next month. What if we lose the house? What if we go bankrupt?”
Just reading that, don’t you feel your blood pressure rising?
But what if instead, those thoughts went like this:
“Man, buying our house was probably not the wisest thing. While I can’t undo our decision, we can make this a personal growth opportunity. I know God loves us, and I trust in him to provide and take care of us. Tomorrow, we can brainstorm some side hustle ideas. I’m really going to try to stand out so I have a good chance at that promotion. Everything will be okay.”
Which of the two soundtracks do you think will produce better results?
My bet is on the second one. Mindset really matters, and you get to choose what kind of thoughts live inside your head.
Beyond mindset, good life habits are also crucial to attaining your goals.
Take small steps to reverse any less-than-desirable financial habits. If you struggle with debt, consider the debt snowball method. This is where you pay off your smallest debt first, the next smallest debt after that, and continue with the process. You build momentum with each incremental win.
When you’re feeling more confident about finances, you can easily improve in other areas of life. You’ll free up time and have the energy to reinvest in relationships – whether that’s self-care or relationships with others you love. Spending money on a massage or a date night won’t seem as worrisome.
Improving your physical health will also come naturally. Want to run a 5K or half-marathon? You’ve already exhibited self-discipline with finances. Use that same discipline to create and adhere to a training schedule.
If you need to buy gear for a triathlon, you won’t be as concerned with the financial outlay. Rather, focus on the goal (completing the triathlon) and trim other less meaningful expenses in your budget. Just remember to keep this fitness goal fun.
One of my WorthyNest® clients took calculated steps to improve his financial situation, and he got in better physical shape as well.
He was underinsured and received an unfavorable health rating for life insurance earlier, so the insurance premium was his primary motivator. He overhauled his diet, created a rigorous workout plan, and lost a significant amount of weight.
Talk about power through purpose!
2) MONITOR (AND POSSIBLY TWEAK) THE FINANCIAL PLAN
Even the best-laid plans need to be reevaluated occasionally. For instance, if the debt snowball method isn’t working for you, consider switching to the debt avalanche method. Instead of starting with your smallest debt, you pay the debt with the highest interest rate first (regardless of the balance).
Or, let’s suppose you have a good cash flow plan but know you should be saving more for retirement.
You could start by contributing an extra $100 per paycheck to a company-sponsored 401(k) plan. Two months into the change, you realize that you’re pulling money from your family’s emergency fund to pay for daily living expenses. Consider cutting the goal in half and electing $50 per pay period instead.
The important thing to remember is that you’re not locked into your original plan.
You can change things that aren’t working and make adjustments according to how your life unfolds. There is no perfect, one-size-fits-all financial plan. Your financial plan needs to fit the needs that come up in whatever life season you’re experiencing.
3) PRAY ABOUT IT
Accepting mistakes, unexpected setbacks, and our own imperfections is really hard. But the pursuit of holiness doesn’t just involve striving for virtue. It necessarily involves acceptance, letting go, and surrendering.
Most people know the shortened version of the serenity prayer.
“God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.”
The rest of the prayer is even more profound, or rather, adds greater dimension to the meaning of the first four lines:
“Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
As it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
If I surrender to His Will;
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life
And supremely happy with Him
Forever and ever in the next.
Amen.”
It’s so easy to feel like a victim when we struggle. God has a plan for your life, but He also gives you free will. While circumstances aren’t always under your control, what you decide to do at that moment IS within your control.
After prayerful reflection, choose the path to which God is calling you. There are some great books on discernment out there. A Catholic resource that many find helpful is Fr. Timothy Gallagher’s Discerning the Will of God. Or consider a spiritual director (I see Meritt Petrone).
Rely on the serenity prayer or another prayer that speaks to you to turn toward God, rather than away from Him. I especially love this scripture verse:
“Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, so that he may exalt you in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:6-7).
God really does care for you, and He wants to be involved in the messy details of your life. Though life on earth isn’t easy, it’s through faithfulness and perseverance that we make progress.
CAN MONEY BUY HAPPINESS?
I hope this article inspired you to think creatively about ways to enhance your overall quality of life. Financial wellness translates into physical and emotional health.
If you’re struggling with your finances, chances are your body and mind are struggling, too.
To quickly summarize, the three key steps to financial wellness are…
Develop new soundtracks and better habits.
Monitor your financial plan and tweak it as needed.
Pray about your struggles and decisions.
Although money can’t solve every problem, Dr. Elizabeth Dunn believes money can buy happiness if you spend it wisely. Learning wise financial decision-making skills is crucial for living an abundant life.
Want to save more money, pay down debt and gain clarity around family financial goals? Take our free wealth potential quiz.